Dating a Newly Divorced Woman: Pitfalls and Advice
Have you engaged in divorced women dating? Then, you need to get ready for certain pitfalls. But let's say at once: women with a problematic past often learn to appreciate the present. They treat with attention and understanding of men's weaknesses and have enough experience. Therefore, your choice is not even bad, except for some complications that may be waiting for you.
How Soon Is Too Soon to Start Dating a Recently Divorced Woman?
Sooner or later, a woman, after a divorce, begins to have affairs with other men. Some look for a long relationship, and others want to find a partner for one night. But if we are talking about the one who was faithful to only one man for many years, the first experience with other men is traumatic.
Psychologists argue that the so-called “rehabilitation” period can take about a year. But each case is exceptional. It all depends on the reasons for the divorce or who initiated it. Perhaps, a woman was unhappy in the marriage, and she is ready to dive into a new relationship in a couple of months. In any case, you shouldn't act brazenly and insist on going out with you. It's quite common, and a divorced woman may hint she is ready for a new romance, and you can act.
Important Questions to Ask Before Dating a Newly Divorced Women
So, you've started dating a divorced woman, and you don't want to repeat the mistakes of her ex and hurt the girl you like. Not everyone will be ready to discuss her past relationships, but there are a few issues you will definitely want to discuss. Here are some of them:
Why Did You Get Divorced?
You had better know who initiated a breakup and the main reason for not making the same mistakes again. Or your woman might not have let her past relationship go and thinks about it too often. Sometimes, after a breakup, someone in the couple turns everything into an attempt to prove to an ex-partner that he/she was wrong and takes it all back.
Was It Painful?
Before you ask a lot of inappropriate questions, it's worth figuring out if your girlfriend wants to talk to anyone about it. Of course, divorce is unpleasant even if a woman herself wanted it badly. Sometimes, having realized you spend a few years on “not your man” may destabilize even a strong in spirit woman. If she perceives the topic of her divorce painfully, she is still worried about it and hasn’t recovered to the end. Then, you have to wonder: is she ready for a new relationship?
What Are Her Current Relationships With Her Ex-Husband?
If a woman always negatively recalls the ex, it's worth wondering whether this criticism corresponds to the truth. If a man is so bad, why did she decide to get married to him at all? If your lover's ex has both good and bad traits, why is your woman so aggressive toward him? Maybe he cheated on her cheating, or perhaps your woman is not as perfect as you think she is. As a rule, both are equally guilty in divorce.
What Are Her Needs and Plans?
At first glance, it may seem that after a painful divorce, a person avoids any relationship. Still, that's not always true. Sometimes, a female doesn't want to go through the experience of a serious relationship again, and sometimes she is even ready to try a new marriage with another man. By stating your views on the situation at the beginning and getting a response, you can conclude what kind of relationship awaits you in the future.
Guide to Dating a Divorced Woman
Men need to consider that a divorced woman has had at least one negative experience with the stronger sex. Divorced women will be much more vulnerable and cautious in future relationships. They will test you for a long time before they agree to start a family again. Therefore, it is necessary to stick to a number of simple rules on how to date a divorced woman:
Consider Your Partner’s Needs and Keep in Mind Your Own Ones
Divorce can change not only a girl's self-esteem but also the perception of everything around her. Right now, she needs time and space to cope with the trauma. She can feel resentment, but your support will help her heal and become a better person. Be honest. If you don't have the patience to deal with all of her problems, don't get involved.
Accept the Way She Changes
The difficulties she has faced may have made her a tough and independent lady struggling to cope with the effects of the divorce. Appreciate your woman's efforts and focus on positive personal qualities. She may be wary of a new relationship, but your sincerity and persistence over time may help her think about a serious love affair.
Support Your Girlfriend in Career
Praise your beloved one’s achievements to show you care about her. Don't make her quit the job just to become a housewife. Admire your girlfriend’s independence and self-sufficiency sincerely.
Accept Her Kids
If you are dating a divorced woman with kids, you take responsibility for both your woman and her children. Don't be bossy and avoid making negative comments about your partner’s ex-husband, as this can be traumatic for kids. You need to make them feel comfortable and safe in front of you.
Show Your Love Not Sympathy
True love is always the best therapy. Treat her feelings and thoughts with respect. Honest communication is the key to a trusting relationship. She needs your love, not your sympathy. Listen to her needs, complaints, and concerns. Your willingness to understand her problems helps build trust, which is very important for both of you.
Life after divorce isn’t full of bright colors. So, you have to be cheerful if only to improve her mood. Remember that you are someone who can make her life peaceful again. Your attitude will also help her learn to deal with life's problems in a positive way.
Be Serious in Your Intentions
The most important thing is your sincerity. Don't initiate a relationship if you can't be serious about anything long-term. Starting a new relationship means a lot to a divorced lady. She's already been through one agony. If she is dating you, it means she is relying on you. Don't play with your emotions. She doesn't need anything but your sincerity and commitment. A divorced woman may be a better life partner because she understands the value of this relationship more than anyone else.
A divorced woman has different demands on men and relationship expectations than one who hasn't been married yet. She already has the experience of family life. There is pain and disappointment after a failed love. Certain conclusions have been made and summed up. However, if she still lets you into her life, she trusts you and is ready to start building a relationship from scratch. Challenges make us stronger if you're ready for them.